A woman I was speaking with asked me this question and the answer is quite simple…
“Treat yourself like one.”
Lavish yourself daily or weekly with the best treatment. It doesn’t have to be a new pair of Christian Louboutin shoes either.
The simplest things in life can give you so much pleasure. You should choose things that contribute to your overall well-being. (Not guilt over having spent money on something you didn’t need or bought as a “quick fix’.)
When my girlfriend and I had when we both lived in Rome, we had a weekly ritual to take a stroll around the Spanish Steps area in Rome (that’s us in Piazza di Spagna). We had a favorite bar in Via dei Condotti we would frequent. Bars in Italy are like community gathering rooms, for the young and mature.
Bars are visited several times a day. Some eat a hot croissant and espresso on the way to work. Some enjoy a fruit juice and mini pizza with a colleague at lunchtime. Others, would meet with friends after work or at the weekends.
It is the place to see and be seen.
My best friend and I would meet there once a week (sometimes twice). The barman would welcome us with a big smile and he created a drink especially for us (a mixture of Sprite and pomegranate Grenadine). I think he even named it after us. (Those men are so cute and flirtatious!) We would sit at a small round table and chat away about what was happening in our lives – my latest date, an art exhibit or if we were going to take a weekend trip somewhere.
I know it sounds like the simplest thing, but it felt so good…
So know you’re probably thinking, “Rhonda, what in the world does THAT have to do with getting men to treat me like a goddess?”
Everything.
This is going to sound so basic, but men will treat you like you treat yourself. If you do not pamper yourself, love yourself and give yourself the pleasures you want…neither will they.
Simple as that.
Can I ask you a question? Of course I can, it’s my blog! 
Think of a woman you know who complains that men do not treat her well. We all know at least ONE. Take a look at how she treats herself. Does she take care of herself well? Does she act like she loves herself? Does she say things like, “I don’t have time to take care of (you fill in the blank).” Or, does she wait for a man to do things for her, yet she is not willing to invest in herself first?
You get what you give others. You also get what you give yourself.
Start today, fall in love with yourself. All those little things you do for your girlfriend or you would do for a guy you’re dating, start lavishing them on yourself.
Treat yourself like the goddess you deserve to be treated like. This is something you cannot fake. We are made of energy and whatever we feel inside we send out into the world around us.
People feel it (consciously or subconsciously) and they will treat you likewise. Sound too ‘woo-woo’ for you?
Try it and see.
You will discover paying special attention to yourself may seem decadent at first, but by putting your energy into your deeper needs, you are treating yourself to the best gift of all – a healthy mind, body and spirit. No one can give it to you and no amount of money can buy it. – Dr. Dorothy
Of course, I wouldn’t leave you without your action plan, would I?
THIS IS WHAT YOU DO NOW:
Take out a piece of paper and a pen. Write a list of small things that give you lots of pleasure. We all have things we like to do, but have not done in a while. Just keep writing until you can’t thing of anything else.
1. Take 5 of those things you haven’t done in a while that give you pleasure. For example:
- Having lunch with your girlfriend.
- Visiting the zoo (I love the zoo!).
- Sipping a drink in your favorite cafe’.
- Going to the park to read a book.
- Browsing your favorite section of a book store.
- Taking a bubble bath.
- Have a “rock concert”. (My daughter and I blast music while running around the house singing at the top of our lungs!)
As you see, it doesn’t have to be the most lavish thing, it just needs to replenish your soul, make you laugh or smile. Reconnect you with yourself or someone you love (other than a man).
The simpler, the better, because you can concentrate on the pure enjoyment of the moment — not the rush of buying or eating something.
2. Look at the next 4 weeks and choose one day a week to do one of these things. The 5th one is just in case one of the others doesn’t work out. For example, let’s say you want to have a picnic with friends in the park, but it rains that day. You’ll have a backup plan.
Do this and not only will you start to attract better quality men (those who treat you well), but you will feel freer and enjoy life more.
Now go love yourself!
Rhonda
P.S. Just so you know, I love writing for you, but my posts are never complete without your feedback. Let me know I’m making a difference in your life, what your thoughts are…or share a ritual you like with the other ladies who read this blog.
Take a minute to leave your thoughts and I’ll comment back.
